We're often told that you should do things for others rather than for yourself, but we think there is one time when YOU are more important than THEM. 

That one time is when you need to crank out some forgiveness.

It kind of sounds like one of those sappy words that your mum talks about when your little brother vomits all over your new shoes.

When you’re little, it’s normally just something you have to say you’ll do so that you don’t get into trouble for showing how annoyed you really are.


Forgiveness often seems more about the other person than about you. 

As sappy as forgiveness may sound though, it can be one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to do, because if you let unforgiveness grow, it can become one heck of an ugly, gnarly monster. The bigger it gets, the harder it is to get rid of. 

Sure, forgiving your little brother for ruining your new shoes isn’t too hard, especially as the vomit smell starts to disappear after about a month. 

But sometimes people do things to us that aren’t so easy to forgive. Sometimes those people are the ones who you should have been able to trust.

Forgiveness isn’t letting someone off the hook for what they did though.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean that you’re saying what they did was ok. 

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Forgiveness means deciding that you won’t keep holding that thing against them. 

Forgiveness means not going over and over and over that situation in your head.

When unforgiveness grows in our lives, it turns into a disgusting and rank old thing called bitterness that makes us twisted and cranky, inside and out. Bitterness has a way of showing on your face and in what you say.

Just like that saying goes, “bitterness is the poison you swallow, hoping the other person dies.”

Bitterness is toxic and as long as you hold onto it, that person continues to have control over you.

So as you can see, the 'I' in "I forgive you" is far more important than the 'you'. 

You're probably working out now, there is nothing weak about forgiveness.

Forgiving can be downright hardwork- a million baby steps that require the bravery of a loud and proud Beiber fan at a Kanye concert.

Let’s decide that we value our freedom more than holding onto those offences, giving someone else control of our lives.


Before you go!

Forgiving doesn’t mean that you are saying what someone did to you was ok, it means you aren’t going to let that keep controlling your life. If someone has hurt you or violated you, you need to tell someone you trust about it.

You could tell a parent, a school counselor, chaplain or a teacher you trust.

If you don’t have anyone you can tell who will do something about it, we think you should chat with our friends-